Starting over is typically something you do after hitting rock bottom. Let’s say you just got out of a toxic long-term relationship, or you were brutally fired from your 9-5 job. You will likely be told it’s an opportunity to chase your dreams. But what about the people who don’t hit rock bottom? What about those who are just... coasting by?
Until very recently, I was fairly unhappy with the life I spent 21 years creating for myself. I hated the way I was perceived by others, hated the way I perceived myself, and hated the fact that I was too unmotivated to do anything about it. It’s easy to fall into a bare minimum lifestyle, especially when the minimum isn’t all that bad. It takes no effort to watch other people take risks, and to accept that you aren’t destined for greatness. However, I’m here to remind you that it’s not too late to start over, and you don’t need to hit rock bottom in order to take that leap.
You owe yourself another shot at life! During my personal “starting over” journey, I realized there were many hidden barriers preventing my happiness. Below, I listed a few steps I took to makeover my life! I hope this advice helps you with your new life journey.1. Stop caring about what other people think.
You’ve probably heard this cliché prompt a million times, and although it sounds ideal, it really is easier said than done. The best advice I can give is to ask yourself why you care. In addition, ask yourself if other people’s judgments are more important than your potential happiness and growth. I always struggled with the fear of being judged, and this prevented me from being authentic around others for a very long time. The truth is, people are going to talk about you no matter what. Just remember, your success will always make someone else mad, so you might as well do what you want.2. Wear clothes that make you feel good.
Personally, changing how I presented myself to society was an important part of starting over. Finding confidence in my appearance allowed me to feel more comfortable putting myself out there. For example, if I were to go to a coffee shop dressed in sweats and my hair up in a messy bun, I wouldn't possess the same confidence as if I was wearing a sharp black blazer and platform wedges. You don’t need to always be dressed fashionably or have a full face of makeup in order to feel good about yourself. Some people find strength in some cute yoga pants and ugg boots (Hello 2009!), and I’m so here for it. However, there’s no shame in putting in the extra effort. Find a style and figure out what clothes make you feel powerful, comfortable, and like YOU! I promise, you'll see a change in your self-esteem.3. Surround yourself with people who motivate you.
I’m not telling you to cut out everyone in your life who doesn’t talk about their goals all day long. However, it’s important not to spend all of your time with people who only gossip or speak negatively. Having a limited friend group of people who value success and growth is more beneficial to me than having a bunch of surface level friends that I could go to the bars with on weekends. If you’re serious about creating a better future, remember that you become the people you surround yourself with.
4. Set goals & journal.
Starting over meant setting new goals that I previously never would have considered. It’s easy to rely on that “someday” mindset, and convince yourself that you’ll achieve your aspirations one day in the future. However, we have to be real with ourselves and realize that this is an excuse rooted in either fear or laziness. No matter what age you are, you have the freedom to set goals and believe in yourself enough to achieve them. It’s okay to start with small tasks and build your confidence by gradually completing them. This will show you that you’re capable of achieving anything you put your mind to. I encourage you to take twenty minutes out of your day to journal your goals and plan specific steps to achieve them.
These are simply a few steps to begin creating a new start, but don’t let it stop here! Reflect on what parts of your life could use some alterations, and push yourself to create the changes you deserve. It doesn’t matter if you’re sixteen or fourty-seven, it’s never too late to find the beauty in starting over.
Written by: Emma CookeInstagram: @emmakooke