1. When a few months into our relationship, I pressed him on his mom-who he had told me- was deceased. It turned out she was alive and lived nearby but she was “dead to him”. More and more questions arose and previously ignored red flags began to wave visibly…. -L.H.
2. I knew it was over when I noticed he had stopped engaging with our son and me. He worked a late shift at work so when he was home, he would sleep or play video games. Never used his home awake time to do stuff with our son or me. However, I never asked why he wasn’t engaging with us. -J.N.
3. When I realized that if we got married I would cheat on him. -P.H.
4. I was on a first date with a guy and it was going really well! We vibed and were having a blast. I was stoked at the potential of where this could lead. were both back living with our parents temporarily and so when I asked him what his plans were he said. “Well, I’m actually going into the Peace Corps in a few weeks. I’m going to Mozambique for 27 months”. I was a little drunk so the math took a minute and the location of this country I had never heard of took a second to sink in. That was the moment I knew it was over. To wait two and a half years for a guy based on the feelings of a first date was not what I was willing to do. We had a blast dating for those few weeks before he left town but I had already put an expiration on it. -M.W.
5. When I thought that this cannot be it for the rest of my life. And when he voted for Trump. -M.J.
6. When he stopped kissing me before leaving for work and stopped coming home afterward and went to the bar instead. It was also a clue the relationship was over when I’d rather spend time at my parent’s house than at the apartment we shared. -S.B.
7. The dealbreaker was the moment when it finally clicked that, yes, it was him who was slamming me into the wall. No matter how loud I screamed for him to stop and let go he wasn’t. That click felt like a switch in my brain because all love I had for him immediately switched off at that moment. How could I love someone who was now a stranger? I no longer knew this person. That was the moment I knew the relationship was over and I had to get a divorce. -J.L.
8. We had been together for three years and the lease on my apartment was ending. I wanted to move in together. He did not. -T.F.
9. The moment I knew it was over was when interrupted my studying and got pissed that I couldn’t hang out. I lived in the front room of a house and suddenly could hear whistling outside and coming my way down the block. I was still in college at the time and was in the middle of studying for an exam so was not very enthusiastic when the whistling turned out to be him unannounced at my door. He was in such a chipper mood (if the whistling wasn’t enough of a clue) and wanted to hang out. I told him I was in the middle of studying for an exam I had in the morning but was free later tomorrow. His face instantly soured and he loudly told me how much I had ruined his good mood and abruptly left. Without missing a beat I went right back to studying. Deuces. -K.B.
10. I knew it was over when he genuinely got mad because I didn’t say “god bless you” when he sneezed. -J.G.
Author: Jocelyn Hall