7 Ways to Tell if your Relationship is Toxic

We’ve all heard the term “toxic relationship”, but what does that terrifying label truly entail? Surely, every relationship has its ups and downs. Healthy communication will result in disagreement; this doesn’t mean your relationship is broken. It’s completely natural for two individuals with two separate minds to have differences of opinion. However, when it comes to resolving these differences, compromise and trust are essential to maintaining open lines of communication. Relationships break down when a barrier arises between two partners, and avenues of communication cease to flow. Below, I’ve listed 7 major warning signs that your relationship is turning toxic. 

1. Lack of trust

Trust is the foundation of a healthy relationship. Without trust, you truly don’t have anything. You need to be able to depend on your partner, and have confidence in their fidelity. It’s important to know that your partner genuinely means what they say. If their words are empty, your heart will also feel the same. 

2. Unclear boundaries

Every couple has a different set of boundaries they abide by. While some people still maintain cordial contact with exes, others would find this to be a deep betrayal. You must communicate with your partner your specific needs and boundaries in order to build a secure relationship. Or else, you’ll both be left unnecessarily hurt by your partner’s actions. 

3. Lack of transparency

“Where are you going?”

“Out.”

“Who are you texting?”

“No one.”

This type of dialogue simply will not support a long-lasting, healthy relationship. You and your partner deserve full transparency, a pivotal cornerstone of trust. Hiding things from your partner is simply not an option. While it is okay to have personal space and time, it is important to always keep your partner in the loop!

4. Codependency

Codependency can turn really toxic, really fast. When you rely on your partner for all of your emotional needs, and cannot function as an individual, you might be in a codependent relationship. The same is true if the roles are reversed, and your partner heavily relies on you for mental stability. If you find yourself becoming codependent, a therapist is an ideal outlet to support your mental health needs. 

5. Poor communication 

Sub-par communication can leave a partner feeling rejected, unappreciated, and unheard. Consistent and open communication is essential to building a healthy relationship. Once you begin internalizing your concerns, and failing to communicate with your partner, you build a barrier. Barriers are difficult to overcome, and place immense pressure on the relationship. The only way to overcome these obstacles is to communicate consistently and openly with your partner. 

6. Resentment 

Resentment can build up for no apparent reason, or due to a plethora of inconveniences mounting over time. Once you begin resenting your partner, you will feel less gratitude and affection toward them. Relay your concerns with your partner in order to mend these escalating fractures.  

7. Lack of effort 

Effort is everything when it comes to a relationship. You have to constantly remain focused on building healthy lines of communication, while meeting your partner’s needs. A relationship, when left unattended, will surely deteriorate. Like a garden, it requires consistent loving-kindness. 

Just because your relationship is toxic in the present moment, doesn’t mean you can’t overcome these hurdles. If both you, and your partner, are hell-bent on building an enduring dynamic, these struggles can be overcome! However, this process is a two-way street. Both members of the relationship need to be focused on achieving the same goal. If only one person is determined to mend the relationship, then the relationship is destined to fail! Don’t place yourself in a situation designed to incite pain and hurt. You deserve a partner who fulfills your needs, and consistently works to improve your connection!

Written By: Brianna Rauchman